// Internet Duct Tape

Bill Gates for President

Posted in Humor, Links, Technology by engtech on November 30, 2006

I don’t often foray into the realm of politics (I’ll leave that to Beats Entropy), but this is one I can’t turn down. Scott Adams makes some compelling points that Bill Gates would make for a fine president of the USA. Someone has even created a website: http://www.billgatesforpresident.net/

Scott makes a *very* compelling argument:

I was amazed at the reaction when I first mentioned the idea. Most of the comments were one of these.

1. I would vote for Bill Gates.
2. Bill Gates did (some evil business thing)

The fascinating thing is that even the comments about his evil-doings are FAVORABLE to the concept of Bill Gates for president. The man took one look at capitalism and beat it like a 14-year old boy with unrestricted Internet access. Bill Gates is a winner. Wouldn’t you prefer having him on your side for a change, beating the crap out of North Korea instead of Netscape?

Forget about whatever Bill Gates did in the past that made you curl up with your free copy of Linux and cry. In his first week in office he’d probably link Microsoft Virtual Earth to the government’s spy satellites so you can look for Osama yourself. I’ve always felt that terrorism is a technology problem disguised as a political problem. Bill Gates can fix that.

For my president I want a mixture of Mother Teresa, Carl Sagan, Warren Buffet, and Darth Vader. Bill has all of their good stuff. His foundation will save more lives than Mother Teresa ever did. He’s got the Carl Sagan intelligence and rational mind. He’s a hugely successful businessman. And I have every reason to believe he can choke people just by concentrating in their general direction. You can’t tell me that wouldn’t be useful at a summit.

I’ve always felt that you should pick a president the same way you’d pick an attorney to help you out of a dangerous legal problem. Do you want the attorney who dresses nicely and belongs to your church? Or do you want the attorney who can rip out your opponent’s heart and put it on the hibachi before he dies? Maybe it’s just me, but I want an attorney who is part demon. And I want a president who isn’t afraid to make rational decisions.

Previously: Reasons why Steve Jobs isn’t the next Bill Gates

6 Responses

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  1. [...] We’ve had a rough (but great!) day here at Bill Gates for President dot net. After being featured on Scott Adams’ The Dilbert Blog, our url traveled the web at high speed, quickly ending up on Slashdot, and quite a few other websites, blogs and discussion boards … The high amount of traffic less than two days after the official launch of this web page was a bit too much for us to handle for about an hour, but after moving to a new web server (Yes, we’re still on a linux machine!), we were able to recover within a decent time frame. We would like to thank everyone for the attention this website has received, and apologize for the short downtime! [...]

  2. Paul McNamara said, on December 01, 2006 at 11:11 pm

    Those who just cannot get enough of this particular topic can find my “Gates for President Bandwagon,” Day 1 coverage here:

    http://www.networkworld.com/community/?q=node/9430

    And today’s followup coverage here:

    http://www.networkworld.com/community/?q=node/9450

  3. jaybird said, on December 04, 2006 at 10:24 pm

    You’re a closet Microsoft supporter, aren’t you?

  4. engtech said, on December 05, 2006 at 3:55 am

    I’m a closet “anyone but George W supporter”

  5. A.J. Valliant said, on December 19, 2006 at 7:53 am

    Aren’t you both Canadian?
    We are way to obessed with American politics.
    Just ignore them and they will go away…like repressed memories of amourus grade school teachers.

  6. engtech said, on December 19, 2006 at 9:45 am

    Oh Mr. Phillips…


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